This MEB has ruined my life/career

OmeletCookingChamp

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Joined
Jul 13, 2017
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#1
I've been struggling with a anxiety and depression for years but always did a good job at hiding it at work. It wasn't until they canceled my assignment to a different base where things got worse. I finally cracked and broke down. I guess they figured the MEB would go smoothly and they'd return me to duty but I can't stop dwelling on losing my assignment overseas.
I think about it everyday, it makes me angry and depressed. I use to be the go to guy at work and now my image and reputation has been tarnished. People ask why I'm still here and how I was suppose to go overseas. I don't even know how to respond to them. What's worse is that I'm a supervisor. How am I suppose to supervise and mentor the lower ranking folks when I can't even take care of myself?

I don't care about anything. I could get medically retired with a high percentage and it wouldn't fix anything. It wouldn't fix my problem, it sure as shit won't salvage my career. I could get returned to duty but I feel like the damage has been done, I have never felt so negative and unmotivated in my life.

I wasn't sure if I was going to do 20 years, I was taking it one enlistment at a time but this MEB has truly ruined me. My motivation, optimism, work drive all gone. I've deployed numerous times with my problems but god forbid I get stationed in a different country with my anxiety and depression. Thanks military doctor for ruining my life.
 

Florida850

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Joined
Dec 24, 2016
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#3
I've been struggling with a anxiety and depression for years but always did a good job at hiding it at work. It wasn't until they canceled my assignment to a different base where things got worse. I finally cracked and broke down. I guess they figured the MEB would go smoothly and they'd return me to duty but I can't stop dwelling on losing my assignment overseas.
I think about it everyday, it makes me angry and depressed. I use to be the go to guy at work and now my image and reputation has been tarnished. People ask why I'm still here and how I was suppose to go overseas. I don't even know how to respond to them. What's worse is that I'm a supervisor. How am I suppose to supervise and mentor the lower ranking folks when I can't even take care of myself?

I don't care about anything. I could get medically retired with a high percentage and it wouldn't fix anything. It wouldn't fix my problem, it sure as shit won't salvage my career. I could get returned to duty but I feel like the damage has been done, I have never felt so negative and unmotivated in my life.

I wasn't sure if I was going to do 20 years, I was taking it one enlistment at a time but this MEB has truly ruined me. My motivation, optimism, work drive all gone. I've deployed numerous times with my problems but god forbid I get stationed in a different country with my anxiety and depression. Thanks military doctor for ruining my life.
I hope things turn around for you. Don't let that MEB discourage you from getting mental health help if you truly need it.
Hang in there man, there's people who care. And I can relate as well.
 

Jason Perry

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#4
I have three separate responses to address your post, @OmeletCookingChamp.

One point is regarding your feelings and disappointment with your career. I have had several times in my life where I felt like you have expressed. I was a previous honor grad from Army Infantry OSUT basic training, later a commissioned OBC attendee who was a "no go" on successive land nav courses, which was enough to get me rolled back to the previous class....then the funding got cut for me and I was reclassed a Transportation Corps Officer. I had follow-on orders for Ranger School and had my career path all set. When I was rolled back, and then my funding was cut, I thought this was the end of my life and my career. Well, it turned out, that by having a strong background in training and being able to talk Battle Tasks, Annual Training plans, and meeting the Brigade Commander's intent, I was a quickly promoted to 1LT, then took early command of a company, and was promoted to CPT way faster than any of my peers to Captain. What seemed a disaster and was for my initial plans turned into later success. Yes, it took moving to another organization until I was able to shake the embarrassment of being a "no go" at IOBC, but, my career advancement accelerated in comparison to my peers. My point here is that what I assumed was a career killer and bad experience actually resulted in a better outcome than I could have hoped for otherwise. I made CPT within 4 yrs of Commissioned service which was a very fast promotion rate and included the fact that I was placed in command of company very early in my commissioned service.

Next, I would say, you should consider and focus on your health, and assuming you are going to be found unfit, to focus on getting the benefits you qualify for.

Finally, you should also, concurrently, seek whatever mental health treatment you need or should get. It sounds like you have some severe issues and my instinct is that they won't resolve without treatment. Your health should be paramount to any other considerations and without treatment, it is unlikely that you will be able to properly function or even enjoy life. So, I suggest you seek treatment or follow up with your providers if you are still struggling or having issues.

Best of luck to you. If you have any questions, please let us know.