Don't know what to do anymore..

NotaPhish

New Member
Registered Member
First let me say that all my life I wanted to be in the Army and I finally achieved my dream last march. I was planning on doing the green to gold program then finishing my 20 as an officer. Unfortunately during Basic life decided to throw a wrench in my plans. While being "smoked" (we were running multiple laps on the track and then low crawling through sand) I heard a loud audible pop and then my knee gave out. I went to the doctor and was diagnosed with microtears in my ACL and a torn lateral meniscus. I did two 6 week 2 days a week increments of physical therapy which didn't help much but I pretended they did because they were talking about possibly kicking me out. Fast forward to AIT my SSG had me doing jump up sprints and I complained about my knee hurting and asked to stop he informed that I couldn't and I was to keep going. Being the good solider I am I followed orders. That being said I collapased again and this time making it far worse. I had to do another 2 sets of 6 week 2 days a week increments of Physical Therapy. That didn't work very well so they performed surgery(meniscal debriefment and orthoscope w/cortisone injection) that was about a month ago and since surgery I have been doing Physical Therapy twice a week and my knee feels the same as before. My doctor has all but said that I'm lying. My chronic knee pain( which is about a 6-7 non-stop) has caused me to became really really depressed and anxious. I been to BH and they told me I have MDD and anxiety. I have been treated like crap through out my Army Career I'm talking about SSG treating me like a faker and a pariah and having other soldiers do it as well. Everyone other than my Therapist thinks I'm full of shit and I'm done. I can't even think about my future in the Army any more because it causes me to have panic attacks. It is a struggle to get out of bed anymore and basic hygiene seems like a chore. I am miserable and am constantly thinking of suicide(passively) I have been in for about a year now and I wish I never joined. My therapist says that I should look into a meb or medical separation. I never thought it would be like this and I loved the army until I got hurt and been treated like this. It breaks my heart that my childhood dream has been turned into a nightmare. What are my options of getting out but keeping my GI Bill. I feel like I deserve that at the very least. I don't want a paycheck I don't care about that I just want to get better and get out with my GI Bill. Please help me.
 

Bigsink

PEB Forum Regular Member
PEB Forum Veteran
Registered Member
First let me say that all my life I wanted to be in the Army and I finally achieved my dream last march. I was planning on doing the green to gold program then finishing my 20 as an officer. Unfortunately during Basic life decided to throw a wrench in my plans. While being "smoked" (we were running multiple laps on the track and then low crawling through sand) I heard a loud audible pop and then my knee gave out. I went to the doctor and was diagnosed with microtears in my ACL and a torn lateral meniscus. I did two 6 week 2 days a week increments of physical therapy which didn't help much but I pretended they did because they were talking about possibly kicking me out. Fast forward to AIT my SSG had me doing jump up sprints and I complained about my knee hurting and asked to stop he informed that I couldn't and I was to keep going. Being the good solider I am I followed orders. That being said I collapased again and this time making it far worse. I had to do another 2 sets of 6 week 2 days a week increments of Physical Therapy. That didn't work very well so they performed surgery(meniscal debriefment and orthoscope w/cortisone injection) that was about a month ago and since surgery I have been doing Physical Therapy twice a week and my knee feels the same as before. My doctor has all but said that I'm lying. My chronic knee pain( which is about a 6-7 non-stop) has caused me to became really really depressed and anxious. I been to BH and they told me I have MDD and anxiety. I have been treated like crap through out my Army Career I'm talking about SSG treating me like a faker and a pariah and having other soldiers do it as well. Everyone other than my Therapist thinks I'm full of shit and I'm done. I can't even think about my future in the Army any more because it causes me to have panic attacks. It is a struggle to get out of bed anymore and basic hygiene seems like a chore. I am miserable and am constantly thinking of suicide(passively) I have been in for about a year now and I wish I never joined. My therapist says that I should look into a meb or medical separation. I never thought it would be like this and I loved the army until I got hurt and been treated like this. It breaks my heart that my childhood dream has been turned into a nightmare. What are my options of getting out but keeping my GI Bill. I feel like I deserve that at the very least. I don't want a paycheck I don't care about that I just want to get better and get out with my GI Bill. Please help me.
You should keep your GI bill as long as you are honorably discharged. I career is ending as well due to medical issues, but I am going to continue supporting SM from the outside. MEB will help you get out and set you up with the VA if found unfit for duty. You may not care about a paycheck, but you can get assistance from the VA for your knee.
 

jahlon

PEB Forum Regular Member
PEB Forum Veteran
Registered Member
I can relate completely to your situation. I'm at the 15 year point in my career and my career is ending via an MEB. For 15 years the service was my calling, and now getting up every day just to have people look at me with pity in their eyes because they all believe that "chronic adjustment disorder" translates into "bat-shit crazy" makes me want to stay in bed with the covers pulled over my head.

Here is my advice to you:

1) Stay in therapy. It sounds like you had a passion for the Army and now just being in the Army is killing you slowly. Work with your therapists on short term improvements and long term goals. You need to be 100% honest with your therapist. Don't make up stuff and don't leave out stuff. Be 100% honest with what you tell him/her.

2) Stay out of trouble. Yes, you are in a horrible situation right now. You didn't deserve what happened to you, neither the knee going out nor the way you are treated. I wish it wasn't this way, but have a giant bulls-eye on you right now. You need to be the most spit-shinned, squared away individual the US Army has ever seen. You do not want any paperwork stuck on you if they do start an MEB on you. If you get out honorably you will carry your GI Bill over with you, so that should be the motivation you need to be 15 minutes early to work, with everything ready to go.

3) Trust people to do their job. Yes, I know that is hard to imagine, but let the process run its course. Also realize, the VA will be the individuals who evaluate your knee. Yes, your AD doctor will write a NARSUM, but the VA will evaluate you and send in their own report.

I wish I had some motivational closing line, but alas I do not. This all sucks. Just keep your spirits up and your head down.
 

chaplaincharlie

Super Moderator
Staff Member
PEB Forum Veteran
Lifetime Supporter
Registered Member
I'm not sure why Army medicine assumes patients are lying. The Army does something to doctors.

Put that behind you and take care of your self. Stick with your therapy, PT and MH. Talk to the patient advocate about a second opinion. Depression frequently occurs with chronic pain/disease. You are not losing it; you are just being human.
 

tony292

PEB Forum Regular Member
PEB Forum Veteran
If your mental health doctor mentioned a MEB for you, ask them to please initiate a MEB for mental health and then add the knee condition as unfitting too
 

halloffame14

PEB Forum Regular Member
Registered Member
Keep your head up bro. I had a meniscectomy as well on both my lateral and medial meniscus on my right knee. My issues also started a year ago in basic but I gave it the good ole drive on. They are now talking about looking at my left knee as well since it's had the same pain and symptoms of my right. I to was motivated to be in the army, be infantry and one day go to selection. After being what feels like drug through the mud, I can care less about being in. I'd rather walk 5 years from now, then worry about appeasing someone of higher rank. Keep yourself and your own's future your main concern!
 

rae.rae2011

PEB Forum Regular Member
Registered Member
First let me say that all my life I wanted to be in the Army and I finally achieved my dream last march. I was planning on doing the green to gold program then finishing my 20 as an officer. Unfortunately during Basic life decided to throw a wrench in my plans. While being "smoked" (we were running multiple laps on the track and then low crawling through sand) I heard a loud audible pop and then my knee gave out. I went to the doctor and was diagnosed with microtears in my ACL and a torn lateral meniscus. I did two 6 week 2 days a week increments of physical therapy which didn't help much but I pretended they did because they were talking about possibly kicking me out. Fast forward to AIT my SSG had me doing jump up sprints and I complained about my knee hurting and asked to stop he informed that I couldn't and I was to keep going. Being the good solider I am I followed orders. That being said I collapased again and this time making it far worse. I had to do another 2 sets of 6 week 2 days a week increments of Physical Therapy. That didn't work very well so they performed surgery(meniscal debriefment and orthoscope w/cortisone injection) that was about a month ago and since surgery I have been doing Physical Therapy twice a week and my knee feels the same as before. My doctor has all but said that I'm lying. My chronic knee pain( which is about a 6-7 non-stop) has caused me to became really really depressed and anxious. I been to BH and they told me I have MDD and anxiety. I have been treated like crap through out my Army Career I'm talking about SSG treating me like a faker and a pariah and having other soldiers do it as well. Everyone other than my Therapist thinks I'm full of shit and I'm done. I can't even think about my future in the Army any more because it causes me to have panic attacks. It is a struggle to get out of bed anymore and basic hygiene seems like a chore. I am miserable and am constantly thinking of suicide(passively) I have been in for about a year now and I wish I never joined. My therapist says that I should look into a meb or medical separation. I never thought it would be like this and I loved the army until I got hurt and been treated like this. It breaks my heart that my childhood dream has been turned into a nightmare. What are my options of getting out but keeping my GI Bill. I feel like I deserve that at the very least. I don't want a paycheck I don't care about that I just want to get better and get out with my GI Bill. Please help me.
Just an FYI for your GI Bill, if you get honorable discharge you should be able to keep it, but it won't be the 100% because you have not had 24 months continuous duty (w/out including basic). I only have 60% of my GI Bill because I was in for 18 months (including basic).
 
data-matched-content-ui-type="image_stacked" data-matched-content-rows-num="3" data-matched-content-columns-num="1" data-ad-format="autorelaxed">
Top